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About Snapitbik

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  1. HI FRIENDS, THIS IS FOR STUDENTS WHO LIVE IN UK.. WE CAN SHARE OUR VIEWS N HELP EACH OTHER BY SHARING INFORMATION. 1ST OF I JUST WANNA KNW.: 1} HOW CAN WE CONVERT STUDENT VISA ONTO WORK PERMIT OR HSMP VISA? where u can get help for this? > wel my ans. is its easy to get HSMP VISA, but hard to maintain the status. u will get for only two yrs n u hv o prove after with ur salary u r HIGHLY SKILLED, then u will after get 3yrs of visa. its better to go with work permit, just find the sponsor n if u r lucky hen u will get directly 5yrs of visa. 2} CAN WE CONVERT OR GO FOR IGS (international graduation scheme.) OR TWES PERMIT (training cum work experiance scheme)? >wel my ans. is for no guys bcoz if u take his u cant convert ur visa. at the end of visa u hv to go ur home country for 1year. 3} HOW TO IMPROVE CREDIT HISTORY IN UK? SO U CAN GET SOME LOAN FOR FUNDING UR STUDY? > wel my ans. is first of all register on electoral register. so u can get credit card n stuff., dont miss any payment. and do the many transaction with the bank(pay in and withdraw).
  2. प्रचण्डः- चट्ट रुमाल सुजाता बांगेको खल्तीमा गणतन्त्र आउने भो सुजाता भटटको गल्तीमा सुजाताः- चट्ट रुमाल प्रचण्ड बांगेको खल्तीमा माफी हुन्छ प्रचण्ड कल्चरल किङ्को गल्तीमा प्रचण्डः- द्रव्य शाहको पालामा मकै थिएनन् डालामा सुजाताः- अहिलेको त्यसको पालामा हिरा जोख्छन् क्विण्टलमा प्रचण्डः- पसिनै-पसिना सुजाता त्यसको गालामा सुजाताः- चित्तै बुझ्दैन प्रचण्ड तिम्रो चालामा प्रचण्डः- दास ढुंगाबाट लडाउने हो कि? मुटु काँप्छ थर्थर् थर्थर् सुजाताः- डराउनै पर्दैन बांगेसित उसका खुट्टै लर्बर् लर्बर् प्रचण्डः- लुटेको पेचवाला टोपी बांगेको शीरैमा खोस्नै पर्छ संविधानसभाको पहिलो दिनैमा सुजाताः- के के हुन्छ खै कुन्नि चुनावको मैदानमा जितेपछि भनूँला कल्चर किङ् नेपालमा प्रचण्डः- त्यसको च्याब्जुको पालामा मकै थिएन डालामा सुजाताः- अहिलेको त्यसको पालामा डलर र युरो स्वीटजरल्याण्डमा प्रचण्डः- लाली चढ्यो सुजाता तिम्रो गालामा सुजाताः- करिश्मा सुन्दर थिइन् क्रान्तिको बेलामा प्रचण्डः- राष्ट्रपति नभइने हो कि छातिभित्र ढुक्ढुक् ढुक्ढुक् सुजाताः- चन्दनको पैसा छरेपछि सुनसरीमा डांडूं डांडूं प्रचण्डः- पहाडतिर एमालेले (भोट) काट्ने तराईतिर मधेशी सुजाताः- कम्युनिष्टहरू लडिराख अब जित त हाम्रै प्रचण्डः- उहिलेको बीपीको पालामा गला जोडिएको दरबारमा सुजाताः- अहिलेको हाम्रो पालामा साइनो ज्यूँदैछ दरबारमा प्रचण्डः- चट्ट रुमाल सुजाता बांगेको खल्तीमा गणतन्त्र आउने भो सुजाता १९ माघको गल्तीमा सुजाताः- चट्ट रुमाल प्रचण्ड बांगेको खल्तीमा माफी हुन्छ प्रचण्ड कल्चरल किङ्को गल्तीमा
  3. Sajan Chale Sasural : Computer professional coming to US. 1942, a Love story : Sticking to one company for more than a year. Dil to Pagal Hai : Staying in India, dreaming of US. Sapnay: Green card. Sadma: Rejected H-1( Visa. Khalnayak : Bodyshoppers. Deewana Mastana : Project Manager - Team Leader. Rakhwala: Project Manager. Mr. Bechara: Computer professional in Singapore. Zanjeer: Company bond. Himmatwala : Breaking company bond. Tohfa: H-4 Visa for your Wife. Mawaali: Before coming to US. Raju Ban Gaya Gentleman: Once you are in US. Chaudhvin ka Chand: Assembly programmer. Sahib Bibi aur Ghulam: Client, your company and you.
  4. 1. After the telemarketer finishes speaking, ask him/her to marry you. 2. Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment, and ask him/her if he/she will give you his/her home phone number so you can call him/her back. 3. Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times. 4. Tell them it is dinner time, BUT ask if they would please hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your dinner conversation. 5. Tell them that all business goes through your agent, and hand the phone to your five year old child. 6. Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to speak up...louder. ..louder. ..louder! 7. Tell them to speak very slowly because you want to write every word down. 8. If they start out with, "How are you today?", say "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems.... ........" 9. Cry out in surprise, "Helen, is that you? I've been hoping you'd call! How is the family?" When they insist they are not Helen, tell them to stop joking. This works especially well if the telemarketer is really MALE.
  5. Snapitbik

    Laloo Jokes

    Once Laloo Ji was coming out of Airport. As there was huge rush the security guard told Laloo "WAIT SIR" For which Laloo replied "65Kgs" and moved on... Laloos family planning policy.. "Don't have more than two children in one year" After having become the CM of Bihar, Laloo decides to pose for a picture, To show he is down to earth CM he decides to pose along with a herd of buffaloes and resting his elbows on the back of the cattle he poses for the photo. Next day the photo appears front page of a newspaper. GUESS THE CAPTION "Laloo, third from left" A reporter asked Laloo "What is the main reason for a divorce ?" "Marriage"
  6. I didn't do it because I didn't want to add to MY TEACHER'S already heavy workload. I made a paper plane out of it and it got hijacked. I put it in a safe, but lost the combination. Some aliens from outer space borrowed it so they could study how the human brain worked. I loaned it to a friend, but he suddenly moved away. I left it in my shirt and my mother put the shirt for washing. My little sister ate it. Could not log on to indianchild. com. A sudden wind blew it out of my hand and I never saw it again. I was kidnapped by terrorists and they only just let me go, so I didn't have time to do it. The lights in our house went out, and I had to burn it to get enough light to see the fuse box. Another pupil fell in a lake, and I jumped in to rescue him but unfortunately my homework drown. I used it to fill a hole in my shoe, you wouldn't want it now. My father had a nervous breakdown and he cut it up to make paper dolls. I didn't do it, because I didn't want the other kids in the class to look bad.
  7. Nice poem...........
  8. i guess u can see our king aswell
  9. All the test below are actual IQ tests and are used by many agencies to rate/test your abilities, hence DO NOT cheat. Enjoy 1. man ----------- board Ans. = man overboard 2. stand ----------- i Ans. = I understand ok?....get the drift? Let's try a few now & see how you fare 3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/ 4. r r o a d a d 5. cycle cycle cycle 6. t o w n 7. le / / vel / 8 ... 0 ------------ M.D. Ph.D. 9. knee ------------ light 10. ii ii ----------- O O 11. dice dice 12. t o u c h 13. ground --------------- feet feet feet feet feet feet 14. he's / himself 15. ecnalg 16. death / life 17 THINK and the last one is fun............ 18. ababaaabbbbaaaabbbbababaabbaaabbbb.... SCROLL DOWN FOR ANSWERS........................... 3.Ans. = reading between the lines 4.Ans. = cross road 5.Ans. = tricycle 6.Ans. = downtown 7.Ans. = split level 8.Ans. = two degrees below zero 9.Ans. = neon light (knee-on-light) 10.Ans. = circles under the eyes 11.Ans. = paradise 12.Ans. = touchdown 13.Ans. = six feet underground 14.Ans. = he's by himself 15.Ans. = backward glance 16.Ans. = life after death 17.Ans. think big !! 18.Ans. long time no 'c'(see) So, whats your score?
  10. 1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't. 2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. 3.. I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend on Me! 4.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them. 5.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. 6.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. 7.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me 8.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. 9.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. 10.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are missing. 11.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. 12. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine. 13.. God must love stupid people; He made so many. 14.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine. 15.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. 16.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? 17.. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it! 18.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up. 19.. Procrastinate Now! 20.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That? 21.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes. 22.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance 23.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere! 24..They call it PMS because MadCow Disease was already taken. 25..He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead. 26..A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory. 27..Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig. 28.. The trouble with life is there's no background music. 29.. The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson. 30.. I smile! because ! I don't know what the hell is going on.
  11. Cigarette in my hand...I feel like a man... It gives me the confidence.. .that "I can"... You don't agree...?? wait till I show you... Its importance - then you won't argue... I need it with my breakfast toast... To supply me the vitamins I need the most... I need it when I enter my work-place.. . To give me the energy to match the pace... I need it after my lunch... To increase the digestion after the munch... I need it in my coffee break... And that's just for keeping me awake... I need it with my evening snacks... To lift my verve when it sags... I need it when I leave for the day... to relax after the tortuous play... I need it when I move around with friends... to get the "kick" and feel the trends... I need it after my dinner... To adieu my day as a winner. On my way to glory... I overlook the statutory warning written on the pack... For my valour - I should be given a pat on my back. I feed gallons of smoke to my neighbour... Can anyone else boast of such a favour ?? An apple a day keeps the doctors away... The doctors then,won't have any say. I keep the doctors busy n working... The apple would have left them sulking. I contribute heavily in the government's revenues... which help them venture the different avenues... And you want me to quit smoking ?? I am sure you must be joking. I am happy the way I am. I'm no saint up above the hills. And if at all I decide to quit... What'll happen to the company called WILLS ?? WARNING: Cigarette smoking KILLS
  12. A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them. After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight. When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side. When he was close enough, he called out, "Excuse me, where are we?" "This is Heaven, sir," the man answered. "Wow! Would you happen to have some water?" the man asked. "Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up." The man gestured, and the gate began to open. "Can my friend," gesturing toward his dog, "come in, too?" the traveler asked. "I'm sorry sir, but we don't accept pets." The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog. After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence. As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book. "Excuse me!" he called to the man. "Do you have any water?" "Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on in." "How about my friend here?" the traveler gestured to the dog. "There should be a bowl by the pump." They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it. The traveler filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog. When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree. "What do you call this place?" the traveller asked. "This is Heaven," he answered. "Well, that's confusing," the traveller said. "The man down the road said that was Heaven, too." "Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gate s? Nope. That's hell." "Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?" "No, we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind." Soooo... Sometimes, we wonder why friends keep forwarding jokes to us without writing a word. Maybe this will explain. When you are very busy, but still want to keep in touch, guess what you do? You forward jokes. When you have nothing to say, but still want to keep contact, you forward jokes. When you have something to say, but don't know what, and don't know how, you forward jokes. Also to let you know that you are still remembered, you are still important, you are still loved, you are still cared for, guess what you get? A forwarded joke. So, next time if you get a joke, don't think that you've been sent just another forwarded joke, but that you've been thought of today and your friend on the other end of your computer wanted to send you a smile. You are all welcome @ my water bowl anytime
  13. There is a group of animals called cattle, in that group three animals are there. 1. Buffalo 2. Cow 3. Goat Buffalo gives 5 ltrs of milk, Cow gives 2 ltrs of milk, Goat gives 1/4 ltrs of milk, Arrange the animals in such a way that i can get 40 ltrs of milk and animals should be 19. Can u solve this puzzle ???. Tell me the answer....
  14. A little intelligence test for you - no cheating. Some of these questions are from an MBA entrance test. There are 10 questions DO NOT look at the answers found at the end of this document, that would be cheating. Write each of your answers down, it makes a difference. Good Luck. 1. Some months have 30 days, some months have 31 days. How many months have 28 days? 2. If a doctor gives you 3 pills and tells you to take one pill every half hour, how long would it be before all the pills had been taken? 3. I went to bed at eight 8 'clock in the evening and wound up my clock and set the alarm to sound at nine 9 'clock in the morning. How many hours sleep would I get before being awoken by the alarm? 4. Divide 30 by half and add ten. What do you get? 5. A farmer had 17 sheep. All but 9 died. How many live sheep were left? 6. If you had only one match and entered a COLD and DARK room, where there was an oil heater, an oil lamp and a candle, which would you light first? 7. A man builds a house with four sides of rectangular construction, each side having a southern exposure. A big bear comes along. What color is the bear? 8. Take 2 apples from 3 apples. What do you have? 9. How many animals of each species did Moses take with him in the Ark? 10. If you drove a bus with 43 people on board from Chicago and stopped at Pittsburgh to pick up 7 more people and drop off 5 passengers and at Cleveland to drop off 8 passengers and pick up 4 more and eventually arrive at Philadelphia 20 hours later,What's the name of the driver? GOOD LUCK!
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